Deadlines, Complications and a View

Well I have been working hard to keep my work on track to have the house ready to sell, but once again life has changed the plan.  I have been feeling the pressure since meeting with the realtor and committing to make my decision and having the house ready by the middle of December.  Well my pressure went the charts on this past Friday when I was admitted to Hoag via the emergency room.  I woke up that morning ok, but by later in the morning I was suddenly in so much pain.   It was in the upper abdominal area and rediated around to my back, I vomited once and I laid on the bed feeling like I couldn’t move or take a breath.  By late in the afternoon I got myself together enough I went to urgent care, where the doctor examined me by pushing on the areas in pain.   He then told me I had to go to the ER, Oh crap-never somewhere I want to go.  I went home, laid down for a few minutes, then drove myself to the ER.  I was examined again, had labs and an ultrasound and then doctor told me I needed surgery to remove my gallbladder….seriously.  I was admitted in the middle of the night and surgery was early Saturday morning.  This is not what I needed right now!!!  On a random note, I had an amazing view from my room at the hospital.  So I came home late Sunday, still in a lot off pain and not moving well, I have gotten stuck in the bed more than once.  So in the middle of this I had to refigure the timeframe and plan.  So now the decision will be at the end off December, giving a couple of extra weeks to get the house ready, which will put it on the market the middle of January.  This is another financial gamble since I only am sure I can pay the bills through the end of Febuary.  But there are no other options at this point.

On a humorous note [not easy to find right now] I told a freind that now in this condition is when I will finally get a call for an interview!!!!!20161127_072657

Random Updates and Thoughts

Well, first I did not hear back about the interview.  I am trying to maintain my optimism but some days it’s not so easy.  So, with that being said I met with a realtor on Monday to get some information and make sure there isn’t more work I need to do on the house.  Unless something unexpected happens the house will go on the market right after the holidays.  I have so much painting and work that I have to do and work to hire done, but less and less time to get it done.  I find myself sitting, stuck in the memories of 31 years lived in the house.  I knew it could have to end this way, but that doesn’t make it any easier.

Next, Sabrina and I have been fostering a dog for my friend Lilly who rescues dogs.  Lucy, a 1 year old black terrier mix, has been a challenge to say the least.  She needs a lot of patience, but she gives a lot of love to any person that gives her attention.  At times it has been very difficult for me, like the night I had to take her to the emergency animal clinic in the middle of the night, it was a flash back to an endless number of late nigh ER visits with Robby.  And just like with Robby it started with trying to decide whether to go or try to wait it out overnight.  I cried the whole way to the clinic, and the whole way back.  But her time with us is coming to an end, Lilly is in search of a forever home for Lucy.

Finally, as for nightmares/tears/pain…..well status quo.  I have no idea when or if any of that will improve.  You know it’s funny, I have friends that push me about moving on, or getting rid of my son’s things.  But I have one friend that makes sense to me, he said don’t you ever forget your boy, hold on to all your memories, cry whenever you need to and talk about him anytime you need or want to.  Thank you for that advise Curtis.  So I just keep trying to move forward, but I can’t even think about moving on…….