This past week has been full of way too much reality.  We are still living through the consequences of some decisions I made, sometimes it would be better to spend more time thinking, but now it’s done!!!   This week also brought more medical appointments for Robby and I.  Then there was the big reality of the week, my first IVIG infusion.  I have recently had testing that showed that my immune system is not working (simple explanation).  So these infusion treatments will help me be able to get better when I am sick and hopefully not get as sick.  Well I started having side effects during the infusion and by the time it was done I had a headache, horrible low back pain, chills and nausea.  By later I also had muscle pain, lightheadedness, sensitive eyes and fever.  As of today I am still having these side effects, the only thing that has improved is the fever. I keep telling myself this is supposed to make me better.  Then when all else fails my old friend anxiety shows up, just when I thought it was gone.

So, as always, I am trying to remain positive.  But I admit there are times that I feel defeated by life, so I take a few moments and then I once again try to find the upside….this is at times a very difficult task!!!!!